Lemme preface this list with a quick statement: We’ve only been together a short amount of time, but it seems like forever, doesn’t it? Can you believe you actually used to have to work without me trying to stick my tongue up your nose? I don’t know how you survived it.
And I’ve been a good pupper this year. I only ran into traffic THAT ONE TIME and poop on the bathmat every other month or so. I think that’s a decent track record — or at least one deserving of a nice little something(s). So without further ado, here are some small things I could use. You know, just to show me that you care. And when you buy them through these links, Found Animals will get a portion of the proceeds to save more rescue animals like me!
Doggystyle by Snoop Dogg
The song of my people.
These are for when you insist on abandoning me at doggie daycare. Maybe they’ll make those other dogs take a hint. Splurge on these here.
Sometimes I just need to get away from it all and feel the wind in my neck rolls. This thingamajig with GPS will let you know where I am. Buy this must-buy here.
You seem a little annoyed when I try to climb your torso like a tree. I thought this hoodie would be a nice compromise. Get your one-way ticket to constant cuddles here.
Stop leaving me behind when you go to improv class or on a first date. We all know that “great” guy is going to have to meet me eventually anyway. Buy it here.
Okay, if you simply must abandon me for an hour, I will accept this as a consolation prize. This way we can video chat the whole time you’re gone. Buy it here.
It’s about doggies swimming, right? Get it here.
We ran out last week. Don’t let it happen again. Are we understood? Snag it here.
You keep feeding me regular dog kibble. What am I, a peasant?! I deserve freshly made meals delivered straight to our door! Get 15% off here.
So yeah. Those are some small trifles that would make me a very happy doggo. I don’t ask for much. It’s not like I’m your VERY BEST FRIEND AND ONLY ROOMMATE. Great. Kthnx.